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Yet another reason to use Firefox

Tuesday, July 13, 2010
Or Chrome, or Opera etc etc, as demonstrated here.

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posted by Croydonian

And what has this to do with either Boris or TfL?

Tuesday, June 08, 2010
Spotted this at my local tube station yesterday:

Perhaps we can look forward to posters in supermarkets urging us to travel outside of peak times or somesuch.

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posted by Croydonian

Just the thing for today's thrusting young executive

Thursday, October 29, 2009
Behold, 'the environmentally friendly bag for businessmen from Croatia...to be exhibited in London.

The "Tkanica" ethno bag made by weavers from the "Tkanica" association of weavers from Knin, Sibenik- Knin County will be presented at the handicrafts exhibition at Croatian embassy to London from 9 – 12 November'.

Are you ready for this?



(Apologies for the lousy photo) 


Erm, not very FTSE 100, is it?

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posted by Croydonian

Good grief...

Monday, July 27, 2009
Brace yourselves for this from the Hindustan Times:

"Gameloft is a mobile games company that specialises in developing mobile games based on world celebrities and Hollywood movies and will soon release the game on Hilton.

Paris Hilton's Diamond Guest, is the first official mobile game from Paris Hilton, showing the star's glamorous side and elegance, a release in Mumbai said".

Erm, just how exciting will a PG version of a Paris Hilton game be? What could it involve beyond shopping and making foolish observations?



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posted by Croydonian

That's it - the apocalypse is finally upon us

Monday, May 18, 2009
I know I have warned of this a few times in the past, but this time I really have the supporting evidence, as the Ramblers (which used to be called the Ramblers Association, but presumably that was too boojwah, was insufficiently inclusive etc etc) have put out a press release, spotted at ePolitix.com:

"Get Walking Day is the Ramblers' annual celebration of the joy of walking".

OK, with you so far.

"We want to inspire people of all ages to go for a walk on 30th May and, ideally, to continue walking regularly afterwards. Walking is really good for physical, social and emotional well-being".

Unless you are walking back from a funeral, from having been dumped, lost you job etc. However, those are details.

Ok, here it comes:

"No special equipment or training is needed and almost anyone can do it".

See, I was right, wasn't I? And what is more, there is an EDM using much the same form of words, including that stake directed at the heart of anything even vaguely approaching common sense.

Shoot me now. It would be a kindness.

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posted by Croydonian

Two-thirds of Britons in favour of forced labour

Monday, February 23, 2009
Shocked? I am. But a poll for Prospect suggests just that:

"Prospect asked about public support for a new mandatory period of civic service for young people in response to the recession...a clear majority—64 per cent—backed the idea".

'A new mandatory period of civic service', or steering clear of euphemisms, forced labour. This is so unbelievably wrong that my usual lack of faith in the Great British Public has proven to be overstated even at whatever low level I had set it to this morning.

Furthermore, and quite disgustingly, Prospect thinks that this is just dandy - "one bright light was a willingness to consider radical measures to get Britain out of the slump...even in gloomy times, you can’t beat a bit of boldness".

I will resist the temptation to haul out the Cambodia Year Zero analogies, but what, pray is the essential moral difference between universal compulsory labour for a certain age cohort and serfdom? One might note that Prospect's fellow travellers on the other side of the Pond went to the barricades (or Canada...) in order to resist a similar initiative in the 60s and 70s.

Quite apart from my very strong moral qualms about this, imagine the colossal waste of talent if would be first division footballers, accountants, architects and so forth are yanked out of productive employment and compelled to dig old ladies' gardens for a year.

In further evidence that the public has taken leave of its senses, "37 per cent agree...that 'there will be serious social unrest in British cities' requiring the army to restore order". At the time of the 1981 riots I asked my father when he thought martial law would be enacted, and his response was 'never'. He was right then, and would be right now.

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posted by Croydonian

A little something to induce intense nausea

Wednesday, December 17, 2008
Hard-boiled though I like to think I am, along with everyone else I have a weakness for 'It's a Wonderful Life'. Because it is really rather good.

Anyway, an American polling company has asked respondents to recast it with contemporary actors, and the American people have spoken (registration required):

George Bailey - George Clooney
Mary Bailey - Jennifer Aniston
Henry Potter (the villain) - Jack Nicholson
Clarence the Angel - Robin Williams

I trust this is an exercise in kite flying, although given that anything five years older or more is reckoned ripe for ripping off 're-imagining' by Hollywood, it could yet happen. I'd prefer a re-make of 'Santa Claus Conquers the Martians'.

Apparently the film only became everyone's favourite Christmas weepie after repeated showings on US cable channels, they having discovered that the studio had not renewed the copyright or somesuch, and therefore it could be aired on the cheap.

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posted by Croydonian

Ill thought out press release headline o' the day

Wednesday, July 23, 2008
Take a bow, Dept of Health:

Johnson calls for national movement to tackle obesity

Well yes. I suppose any movement apart from placing pudgy fingers into a bag of crisps etc will involve burning some calories.

Facetiousness aside, watch out for the Fat Police at home, at work, at play etc etc:

"Tackling obesity requires a much broader partnership, not only with families, but with employers, retailers, the leisure industry, the media, local government and the voluntary sector".

And the Fat Police number, gulp, 220,000: "I have also written to 220,000 local activists who are already doing excellent work in their communities to promote good health to ask them to shape this movement". That's one for roughly every 200 adults, so I suppose Big Nanny will be forcing entry to one's residence twice yearly to confiscate everything bar lentils and brown rice.

"This national movement for change will enable every citizen in the country at every stage of their lives to get the encouragement and support they need to be healthy - from what they see on the television, to what they buy in the local supermarket, to the resources at their disposal in the local community, to how they travel to and from work or school, to the information and advice they get from health professionals. "We are calling on everyone - from the smallest community keep fit class to the biggest retailers in the land - to join in this campaign to change the way we live our lives."

Instead of all this kraft durch freude, what's wrong with a little bit of personal responsibility, self-denial etc etc?. So, Alan, if I might venture so bold, get stuffed.

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posted by Croydonian

The Britons thinking 42 days detention without trial is just way too liberal

Thursday, June 26, 2008
They want torture. Four per cent of those polled want torture to be generally allowed. Yes, really. 16% like the idea of putting thumbscrews to 'terrorists' (and how will they know that they are, eh?), while the remainder are against torture full stop.

The UK's 82% opposition is equalled in Spain and France, but it falls to 53% in the Land of the Free. And I thought Americans actually read their constitution - the 8th Amendment, perhaps?

On the other side of the coin, majorities think torture of terrorists is just fine - Turkey (52%), Nigeria (54%), South Korea (51%) and India (59%). All of those countries are signatories to the UN Convention on Torture, although India has not ratified it. Iran, a non-party, is 43% anti, and 36% pro. So 21% of them are mouth breathers that have never heard of SAVAK.

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posted by Croydonian

Petition o' the day

Wednesday, June 25, 2008
Am I missing something here?

"We the undersigned petition the Prime Minister to give more Free help to persons with a learning disability at University".

And the detail:

"This is to help those struggling with finances and learning disabilities to further their education through university and to provide a cheaper easier way for those who have a learning difficulty to progress in a world in the ability to read and write are the two Most important factors in any career and life".

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posted by Croydonian

Chemistry for mouth breathers

Monday, June 02, 2008
From the EU, naturally:


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posted by Croydonian

What's wrong with *under* the bed?

Wednesday, April 30, 2008



This does not appear to be a spoof.

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posted by Croydonian

62% of Britons are morons. FACT

Friday, March 14, 2008
Asked 'Have you ever heard or read about the EU's Common Agriculture and rural development policy, the 'CAP', or not?', only 38% said yes.

The moron count is up three percentage points on the year, by the way. Our Gallic chums have progressed from 64 to 65% awareness, while Maltese awareness is down from 17 to 14%.

More from the Eurobarometer agriculture survey later.

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posted by Croydonian

Petition o' the day

Thursday, March 13, 2008
"We the undersigned petition the Prime Minister to Name many more ships after British and French admirals who haven't yet had any ships named after them".

No, I am not making this up.

Erm, I do not think that our jolly jack tars would like that very much, always supposing the French did not scream ruine bleue as soon as the champagne (or light ale, maybe) bottle hit the side. Or if the petitioner thinks that he has also got Sarkozy's ear as well as Broon's, perhaps someone should have a quiet word.

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posted by Croydonian