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"With stupidity, the Gods themselves do battle in vain"

Wednesday, July 09, 2008
A terrifying insight into the minds of Londoners c/o London Councils:

"The poll, carried out by Ipsos MORI, revealed that almost half the people surveyed incorrectly believe that their local council runs the police and hospitals. Only two in five people know which political party runs their own local council, and just 6 per cent of Londoners know the name of their council's leader".

But "one in four said they would be interested in standing for election as a local councillor".

To the hills, to the hills....




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Living in, erm, Bromley, is bad for you

Care of David Evennett, MP for Bexleyheath and Crayfishford:

"how many people were diagnosed with cancer in (a) Bexley and (b) London in each of the last five years?" Source

The good people of Bexley have been diagnosed with cancer at a rate of circa 1000 per year, with the prevailing level in London being 26,000 ish. So, given that Bexleyites make up some 2.9% of London's population, what of the cancer diagnosis rates?

2001 - 3.7% of all London cancer diagnoses
2002 - 3.6%
2003 - 3.6%
2004 - 3.8%
2005 - 3.7%

Historic Surrey / Kent rivalry to one side, I do not suppose the figures this side of the border are much better, and age distribution is doubtless the biggest skew relative to the London-wide stats.

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Where London works

Friday, July 04, 2008

(Click for legibility)

Courtesy of Focus on London, again, plus a little light data mining, a breakdown of employment by borough.

That the City and Westminster lead is not a huge surprise, but I do not think I would have guessed all of Camden (Holborn / Covent Garden), Tower Hamlets (Docklands), Hillingdon (Heathrow), Islington (City borders) , Southwark (South Bank). Sweet home Croydonia comes in at eighth, courtesy of my own ward of Fairfield.

At the other end of the scale, there are just 45,081 jobs in Barking & Dagenham, compared to 561603 in Westminster. However, the ward with the fewest jobs is Fieldway in Croydon - 524. There are 185430 in St James....

Time for one more gratuitous map:

Red - 250000+ employees
Orange - 100,000-250,000
Yellow - 70,000-99,999
Pale yellow - less than 69,999

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An attempt at a London violent crime map


Apologies for the less than intuitive colours, but I have nothing more sophisticated than MS Paint to play with.

Dark green represents total violent incidents of 51-60 per thousand population
Light blue represents total violent incidents of 41-50 per thousand population
Greenish yellow represents total violent incidents of 31-40 per thousand population
Grey represents total violent incidents of 21-30 per thousand population
White represents total violent incidents of 11-20 per thousand population

Figures come from the 2008 Focus on London (p156), hot off the presses. The figure is an aggregate of Met, TfL, Ambulance service and Transport Police figures. The Inner London average is 48.5, and the London average 38.6.

The high Westminster figure is doubtless informed by badly behaved shoppers, tourists etc. Croydon's 33.2 is well below the average, if 33.2 too high.

Any offers to tart up the map will be gratefully received. Should folk find this sort of thing interesting, I might dig up some more data and play with that.

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A national disgrace

Thursday, June 19, 2008
I am shocked, shocked that Gerald Kaufman is having to go maybe 100 yards out of his way every day:

"Sir Gerald Kaufman: To ask the Secretary of State for Transport if she will discuss with Transport for London the absence of bus stops along the western side of Parliament Street near Whitehall and ask for this situation to be rectified.

Ms Rosie Winterton: The temporary absence of bus stops on the western side of Parliament street has been due to extensive street works associated with the Whitehall Streetscape Improvement project....Westminster city council has consulted Transport for London and London Buses at all stages of the project. Work on the western side of Parliament street is now almost complete and buses are once again stopping in the are".

How could TfL etc not have consulted the member for Manchester Gorton? It must be said he is getting on as bit now - 77 - so presumably has had a free bus pass for years.

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Unite to London: "It's my ball and I'm taking it home"

Wednesday, June 18, 2008
Oh yes it is:

"Unite the Union is to cease financially supporting the Latin American stage at the Rise Festival after the Mayor’s Office has targeted its partner in the production, the Cuba Solidarity Campaign, as being a “political campaign group” and therefore unacceptable".

Good for Boris for sending Castro's groupies packing, eh?

And not only but also:

"Not only has the Mayor’s Office banned CSC from the festival site it has also altered the message of the Festival, changing it from anti-racist event to one that celebrates London diversity".

Quelle horreur....

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What have Europe's children done to deserve this?

Thursday, May 08, 2008
"On 9 May, pupils in the schools of the four corners of Europe will discuss the EU's role in the world with European Commission 'ambassadors'. By going local, to talk directly to European students (13-18 year-olds) and listen to their views, the Commission 'ambassadors' will stimulate debate on the EU's commitment to solidarity".

Poor wretches. Especially the children, but I imagine it will be a pretty ghastly experience for the 'ambassadors', some of whom might be relatively blameless.

Meanwhile, the 9th of May is Europe Day. Apparently. And this is what the EU website has to say about it:

"On the 9th of May 1950, Robert Schuman presented his proposal on the creation of an organised Europe, indispensable to the maintenance of peaceful relations.

This proposal, known as the "Schuman declaration", is considered to be the beginning of the creation of what is now the European Union.

"Today, the 9th of May has become a European symbol (Europe Day) which, along with the flag, the anthem, the motto and the single currency (the euro), identifies the political entity of the European Union. Europe Day is the occasion for activities and festivities that bring Europe closer to its citizens and peoples of the Union closer to one another". How delightful.

Europe is not alone in having a day of fervour named for a continent, as it will be Africa Day on the 25th. Not that I am a cynic, but I imagine the Afro bunfight slated for Trafalgar Square was an initiative cooked up by the previous Mayor.

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Do liberal journalists, or their editors, engage in basic fact checking?

Tuesday, May 06, 2008
Not Johan Hari and whoever is running The 'Independent' this week:

"At last – a solution to my Boris blues! I have just forced myself to read the detailed election stats from last Thursday. It seems the media cliché is true: it’s the angry, whiter outer suburbs that elected Boris, out of rage with the congestion charge and council tax. Boris will forever be the mayor of Zones Four to Six, the chief executive of Watford and Bromley and Amersham".

Of those three places, only Bromley is part of Greater London and was able to vote Boris. Watford and Amersham are not within zones 1-6 either.

Further, results are not available at a depth greater than constituency level, and the only constituency which is wholly within zones 1-2 is West Central, also known as Westminster, K&C and Hammersmith and Fulham - 54.8% for Boris. The seat that gave Livingstone his strongest showing - City & East - stretches all the way to deeply chic Dagenham, which is zone 5.

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Pull the other one

Showing more chutzpah than the boy who killed his parents and begged for clemency as an orphan, 'Sir' Ian Blair has had this to say:

"I look forward to developing an effective working relationship between the Met and the new Mayor".

It is a damnable shame that Boris cannot sack the man.

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A thousand years ago..

Sunday, May 04, 2008
I took notes at Conference as to what a Tory mayor of London should do in his first 100 days. Herewith some highlights:

Richard Barnes: "So, the first thing the new mayor should do? Lock the doors to keep Livingstone's advisers and wonks inside while a thorough forensic audit is connected of who does what, why it is done and so forth. Similarly, the accounts will need to be gone through carefully

....

Then TfL needs to be brought under proper accountable and democratic control, and not to be run by a bunch of 1979 throwbacks intent on class war and making life unpleasant for motorists.

The establishment of the Metropolitan Police by the 1829 Act called for the force to engage in the prevention and detection of crime and to ensure public traquility. (I cannot pin down the precise text, but those are the key words) Those are worthy aims, and the people of London, all the people of London are entitled to the full protection of the police 24/7, 365 days a year etc etc"

Merrick Cockell: "Send a skip to city hall,for the political hacks to fill up and exit the premises by lunchtime. (Looks like Barnes and Cockell were not co-ordinating responses, but the divergent sentiments are both pretty good). These advisers are 70s throwbacks disconnected from the real London. And after that, well, throw a party.

As to the other civil servants, they need to be told that unless that they are prepared to work with the mayor, in the manner of civil servants everywhere, then they need to resign. The lease on City Hall needs to be investigated, with a view to getting new premises, possibly overlooking the Treasury, given that it gets £13 billion a year net from London. Further, TfL needs a new chairman, someone with real business experience. Costs need to be cut, expenditure needs to be trimmed. Then appoint a chairman of the Metropolitan Police Authority with real clout - the mayor. The chair of London Councils, the leader of the assembly should meet and talk about future co-operation, and cost cutting.

....

Following the pattern of Michael Bloomberg, the Mayor needs to say ‘This is GOING to happen’ and then see how that expression of will galvanises. One of the things that needs to happen is the equivalent of 311 - a non-emergency number for all public services".

Boris: "We need to get rid of the bat-eared labour spin doctors, who will hang on to the radiators with their finger nails to avoid being dragged out....Once I’m inside the Mayor’s office – and what does it look like? – Stalinist Brutalist I would imagine, I will end the civil war between the Mayor and the boroughs, and I will work with the boroughs, not against them....I will work together with the boroughs and end the civil war. The police budget needs to be looked at , in order to get more police on the beat. As to transport, Livingstone's record is far from great, and the operation of the congestion charge is far from perfect. A Code Red is when a bus driver just cannot take it any more, stops the bus and radios for help - these are up 230%. There has to be a crackdown on hooliganism etc on buses, and we should have PSCOs on buses, conductors AND commission a successor to the Routemaster. There are more than 100 people at LT paid more than £100,000. There are just seven at the treasury....

I will axe The Londoner, Livingstone's propaganda sheet, and spend the money on where it came from in the first place - trees.

So, my priorities -tax payer value, democratic accountability and working with the boroughs. London will be a model for the planet, and as the lion shall lie down with the lamb, so shall the cyclist be reconciled with the bus driver.

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Just briefly....

Saturday, May 03, 2008
Now is the time for gloating, pointing and jeering at the Left in general. Intruding on private grief would be more than reasonable too. I know how they felt on that grim day in '97 and equally well know how they feel now.

While waking up to a Tory councillor, a Tory Council, a Tory GLA member, a Tory City Hall, Mayor and MP is pretty sweet, the bit I am *really* looking forward to is the wailing and gnashing off teeth from the likes of Toynbee and Alibhai-Brown over the next few days. One to savour, I think.

Meanwhile, of the five candidates I know or at the very least have bumped into, hearty congrats to Boris (natch), James Cleverly in B&B and Steve O'Connell in Croydon & Sutton, and commiserations to Andy Jennings in Greenwich & Lewisham and Matthew Laban in Haringey & Enfield.

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New times....

Thursday, May 01, 2008
My man in Haringey & Enfield (hello Justin) tells me that we have been running a *serious* telling operation on Broadwater Farm.

Anyway, an entertaining evening engaging in a little light knocking up in Greenwich & Lewisham with Dizzy, followed by some drinking and breeze-shooting with the G&L crew including the man who, with any luck, will be the next AM. Stranger things have been known.

Early days yet, and I am deeply peeved about the London count being held over till the morrow - and no exit poll - but this does have the makings of the first British election I have really enjoyed since '92. Back then I was also in Croydon, and represented by the splendid, if outgoing, Bernard Wetherill. With my Essex connections, I knew that Basildon was the tipping point. Yes,really.

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The franchise exercised

Well, I've done my bit for democracy and the greater good of the people of London. It being a secret vote, I will not reveal how I voted...

The clerks reckoned that voting had been steady, while the sole teller (for the Blue team) spoke of 'dribs and drabs'. Mind you, I was moved to interrupt a conversation said teller was having with another voter to point out that there was indeed voting in Sutton, what with it being part of the same GLA constituency. Ho hum.

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And he calls himself a socialist

Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Livingstone, I have discovered, is not a member of a trade union. He is, however, a member of Froglife.

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A bit of gratuitous Jowell bashing

Monday, April 07, 2008
A video, not necessarily the original, has appeared at the Number 10 site:



Note that Tessa refers to the Olympic values of 'excellence, tolerance and friendship'. Yes she does, right there at about 40 seconds in. They are bland enough for Ahmadinejad and Kim Jong-Il to sign up to, and not even remotely in conflict with the policies of the 'People's Republic' of China.

However, a little digging reveals points one and two of the charter:

1. Olympism is a philosophy of life, exalting and combining in a balanced whole the qualities of body, will and mind. Blending sport with culture and education, Olympism seeks to create a way of life based on the joy of effort, the educational value of good example and respect for universal fundamental ethical principles.
2. The goal of Olympism is to place sport at the service of the harmonious development of man, with a view to promoting a peaceful society concerned with the preservation of human dignity.

And what is the most basic ethical premise, one shared by every ethical system and every serious religion?: the Golden Rule, or do unto others as you would have them do unto you.

Lest the Chinese government is uncertain how this might apply to cracking heads in Tibet, I offer this from the Analects:

Never impose on others what you would not choose for yourself

Or from the Buddha:

One who, while himself seeking happiness, oppresses with violence other beings who also desire happiness, will not attain happiness hereafter

Meanwhile, Jowell is also noting the people in Downing Street to greet what is basically a rather stylised hurricane lamp, without being honest enough to say that they were hand picked.

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Erm, not quite

PoliticsHome appears to have finally got off the ground, and moderately interesting it looks too.

However, this bit does not do its credibility much good:

"A pioneering online focus group of cross-party MPs, senior political editors, commentators and campaign strategists has delivered a strong majority verdict on the best way for Ken Livingstone to rescue his London mayoral campaign. The Phi100 panel is an expert panel of over 100 of the top political brains in the UK. It includes senior members of the government and some of the biggest names in political journalism, responding by email to 5 political questions every working day".

So far, so ho hum. But what's this? 'Who do you think is most likely to win the London mayoral Election'? 69% Boris, 30% Leninspart, one per cent Paddick. What manner of top political brain thinks Paddick is going to win, eh? The spread at Betfair for Paddick is 100/150 at the moment.....

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The London protests

But for pressure of work I would have gone up to town to cry 'shame' at the Olympic quislings and so forth yesterday, and rather regret that I could not. So, a big round of virtual applause to those who braved the intemperate weather.

Generally speaking, marches, demonstrations and so forth are dismal failures in terms of the outward aim - to change the policies of one's own government or that of another. However, the marchers, banner wavers also have themselves as a psychological target, and Countryside Alliance, CND, stop the war types etc will all have felt a nice rosy glow of self-righteousness and taken away a sense that they had at least done something.

Where the Tibet protests succeeded was not in persuading the 'People's Republic' of China to decolonise Tibet (and come to that East Turkestan), which they are not likely to do any time soon, alas, but to ensure that Tibet's struggle and the vile human rights record of the 'People's Republic' of China becomes global news, and penetrates even the consciousnesses of the boneheaded retired athletes and ''ims and 'ers off the telly' who judged that getting their faces in the papers (that they might plug memoirs, diet supplements, television programmes or whatever) was more important than exhibiting even the most elementary sense of decency. So, Trevor MacDonald, Konnie Huq and the rest of you - avaunt.

That the preservation of law and order was part delegated to a series of Chinese secret policemen / special forces types (they certainly weren't athletes, were they?) is also profoundly shocking.

Meanwhile, make haste to the Number Ten site, and attempt to play the embedded video of the Dour One doing an embarrassed nod at the torch. And fancy, just fancy, a message flashes up saying 'sorry, this video is no longer available'.

And since I am having lots of fun with wonder that is hindsight, enjoy this from Livingstone's site:

"On Sunday 6th April the Olympic flame will be carried across London as part of the global Olympic Torch Relay. Large crowds are expected to cheer on the 80 torchbearers, including Paralympians, Olympic athletes and celebrities as they carry the torch through ten London boroughs from Wembley to Greenwich".

One final (?) afterthought: it is a desperate shame that Peter Hain is no longer in the government, as it would have been delightful watching him trying to square collective ministerial responsibility with his known stances on 'normal sport in an abnormal society'.

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Joanna Lumley running for the London Assembly

Thursday, March 27, 2008
Chaps of a certain age will visualise La Lumley with that shocking 70s haircut that she sported in 'The New Avengers' (the last British series to be networked in the States, apparently) , others will think of her as in that dire comedy with the one of French & Saunders not married to Lenny Henry. Doubtless there are other options, but there she is in the list for the English Democrats, at #9.

It would appear that there are two Lumleys, and this one looks to be quite youthful, so I would think that either her parents refused to have a television or had a sadistic streak. Unless she changed it herself, of course.

I think it is fair to say she will not get elected this time.

Elsewhere, note 'Chris Forster Former local authority auditor and accountant, now working as a psychic and psychic event organiser'. One would think that the tea leaves, auras or whatever would tell him he is wasting his time. Maybe they already have. It would be selfish not to haul out (again) the tale of Kelvin Mackenzie's letter sacking The Sun's astrologer - "As you will already know..."

More later, if more comedy is detected, and a tip of the hat to Justin for sending me the link and letting me have first crack at mocking it. No names, but he tells me that one candidate lost a job for accessing kiddie pr0n at work and another has a similar taste for forbidden fruit.

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Sucking eggs - a handy guide from the Mayor of London

Tuesday, March 25, 2008
Our old friend Felicia Nicolette 'Nicky' Gavron and Joan 'Unilateral nuclear disarmament' Ruddock have got together to launch "a report which addresses how homes in the South East of England can be adapted to the impacts of climate change". So anyone outside those areas best not read it. (Rather amusingly Ruddock is Minister for Waste, although I do not doubt her colleagues could challenge that title based on their achievements).

Anyway, "The three regions addressed in the report have a housing stock of more than nine million homes with 21 million people living in these homes. Of these properties, the majority were planned and designed for climatic conditions prevalent at the time of build. These climatic conditions have altered and the projections of changing climate in the coming decades suggest that the climate will continue to change, while adversely affecting these homes". More here.

I do not have the energy to go into the ins and outs of the logic of scientific discovery, 'proving' hypotheses and the like, but one does have to marvel at the idea that it can be averred that climate change has occurred when London and Roseland's weather over the last 50 years is well within prior norms. The really cute bit about the press release is the bet hedging - no references to global warming - so it could mean getting triple glazing for the forthcoming ice age, or it could mean installing air conditioning (although The Man does not approve of that) to deal with the delightful Mediterranean climate that, judging from the weekend's snow, is clearly upon us.

Anyway, enough of this skirmishing, onwards to see what can be done to protect Croydonian Towers from the ravages of climate change.

And the possibilities for mockery are better, far better than I could possibly have imagined. It really is 'hug oneself in delight and burst into song' levels of idiotic.

Yes, really:

"Homes need to be protected against the heat levels experienced in the summers of 2003 and 2006. There are many options, from simply opening windows to installing shutters or awnings". It also definitively answers that hitherto perennial mystery, 'Where does the heat come from?'. I am not making this up, although I am beginning to wish that I was. And the answer: 'Heat from the sun soaks into the walls and roof of your home during the day, warming them'. And there was I thinking it was down to malignant sprites breathing hot air through the letter box.

There is nothing else quite on a par with that, but it suggests insurance as a useful precaution against flooding, and - apparently - 'Many measures to improve water efficiency are inexpensive, attractive, effective and will save you money'. It suggests limiting one's shower to 4 minutes, which is a bit raw on anyone with long hair.

More later, perhaps.

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Introducing London's least likely troopie groupie

Friday, March 14, 2008
Brace yourselves:

"Mayor of London, Ken Livingstone, today announced that he will establish an annual Veterans Day event in London. The first event will take place in Trafalgar Square on Friday 27 June 2008...My aim is that on Veterans' Day every year London pays tribute to all our veterans, the sacrifices they have made and our gratitude to those who have served our country in the Forces or in the Merchant Navy and Fishing Fleets".

Is this the same Ken Livingstone who used to consort with people who thought killing British soldiers on active service was just fine? Yes, I believe it is.

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