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Crumbs from the table

Friday, July 25, 2008
Having finally stopped laughing about the humiliation of Broon's homunculus last night, back to blogging:

"The European Commission has approved 31 programmes in 16 Member States ...to provide information on and to promote agricultural products in the European Union". Source

Using your intuition have a guess as to where the money goes:



Did you get it?

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The 'Common Market'

Wednesday, July 16, 2008
Remember when it used to be called that, and we were led to believe it was little more than a free trade agreement?

I would be quite happy with that, but that is no longer on the menu. It does not even stand for inter European free trade any more:

"The European Commission today presented a Report and a proposal for a Directive to amend the current EU excise duty legislation on tobacco. The draft Directive foresees a gradual increase in the EU minimum taxation levels on cigarettes and fine cut tobacco up to 2014....László Kovács, Commissioner for Taxation and Customs Union said: “Today's proposal supports the EU policy to reduce tobacco consumption and narrow the differences in price levels of tobacco products within the EU. It will help reduce illicit trade and cross-border shopping, which undermine the revenue and the health objectives of Member States which impose high taxes to deter smoking. It will give more flexibility to Member States on setting minimum tax levels and will modernise the current rules so as to ensure a level playing field for producers and retailers".

Ever been had?

(Declaration of interest - I am a non-smoker who has lapsed but intends to stop dead tomorrow).

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Three cheers for the Liberals who are actually liberal

Thursday, July 10, 2008
That there is a carve up by the EU 'parliament' to dish the eurosceptics is hardly news, but the plan has been made flesh:

"Members voted on Wednesday, July 9, to raise the minimum number of deputies needed to form a political group from 20 members from a minimum of six member states to at least 25 members, representing seven states".

Had it gone to fifty, the two extreme left parties - the Greens and the Communists - would have been in trouble, not that there was much prospect of that happening.

Anyway, that true believer in democracy, Richard Corbett (Socialist, Yorkshire) thinks the scheme is just great:

"the parliament has "one of the lowest thresholds that exist for allowing the constitution of a political group." "Just 2.5 percent of our membership can create a political group".

Keir Hardie would have been so proud of him.

Anyway, now for the punchline:

"But the new rules came under fire from smaller groups and were also opposed by the third biggest political group in the parliament, the Liberals, who called it "detrimental" to parliamentary democracy and efficiency".

So, good for the ALDE, which houses our own dear LibDems.

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The return of 'free' school milk. Ish...

Wednesday, July 09, 2008
Readers of a certain vintage will remember being force-fed with milk because our overlords in the 70s wanted to inflate demand for milk 'make sure we grew up with strong bones'. The greatest peace time PM of the 20 century did away with it, fortunately.

So much for the history lesson. Our overlords in Brussels are now trying to to inflate demand for fruit 'combat child obesity' by dishing out 'free' fruit and veg to Euroyouth, and some €90 m has been earmarked for the scheme, and "Governments would have the choice of whether to participate or not. The programmes would be co-financed, either on a 50/50 basis, or 75/25 in the so-called 'convergence regions', where GDP/capita is lower".

For the sake of easy maths, let us say that there are 100 million Eurochildren out of 500 million Eurosubjects. Reasonable? So, that would mean less than 80 pence, per year, per head. Hardly worth all the hoo hah, but for the fact of the €90 m not having been magicked into life by Agriculture and Rural Development Commissar Mariann Fischer Boel.

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The French would vote 'no' to Lisbon too

Thursday, July 03, 2008
At least according to this poll I have just found:

'Those opposed to the treaty secure 53% of voice as opposed to 47% in favour. Equally, 33% of those polled would abstain'.

And here is the interesting bit:

'73% of yes voters and 72% of no voters from 2005 would vote the same way now'.

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Separated at birth?

Thursday, June 26, 2008
and

The first picture is to be found at the UK EU Presidency 2005 website (I will explain what I was doing there shortly), and the second is Charles Laughton as Quasimodo in the 1939 'Hunchback of Notre Dame'. Another possible match to that picture of Brown is Ephialtes in Snyder's '300', but all the image matches make him look rather prettier than Brown.

It is not just Brown who has had a less than flattering photo employed at the site, consider these:

An out of focus almost mongoloid looking Blair:


John 'Hypnotoad' Hutton:


And Hillary 'what have I sat on?' Armstrong:


This site, note, was presumably designed to make the UK look great, rather than to hold up its leaders for ridicule. There are some other fairly grim photos, but I reckon I have shown the pick of the bunch.

Anyway, I was rooting around on the site in search of anything memorable having happened during the UK presidency, inspired by a survey commissioned by a French supermarket on attitudes to the forthcoming French presidency.

Asked 'Will the French Presidency have good, bad or no consequences?' 39% think it will be good for France, 18% bad, and a rather more worldly 24%, no consequences at all. Just under a fifth were too stupid to have an opinion.

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Why the Irish Republic voted no to Lisbon

Tuesday, June 24, 2008
Straight from a Eurobarometer survey:

  • 22% - Because I do not know enough about the treaty and would not want to vote for something I am not familiar with
  • 12% - To protect Irish identity
  • 6% - To safeguard Irish neutrality in security and defence matters
  • 6% - I do not trust our politicians
  • 6% - We will lose our right to have an Irish Commissioner in every Commission
  • 6% - To protect our tax system
  • 5% - I am against a united Europe
  • 4% - To protest against the government's policies
  • 4% - To avoid that the EU speaks with one voice on global matters
  • 4% - Because large states decide on EU matters
Etc etc. 14% other, 3% don't know why they voted no.

And as for the yes camp:

  • 32% - It was in the best interest of Ireland
  • 19% - Ireland gets a lot of benefit from the EU
  • 9% - It keeps Ireland fully engaged in Europe
  • 9% - It will help the Irish economy
  • 5% - It gives the EU a more effective way of making decisions
  • 4% - It makes the EU more effective on the world stage

Etc etc. 11% other, 2% don't knows.

I think the results pretty well speak for themselves, but note that if the Irish have to vote again then reason #1 for voting no is a cast iron guarantee that the good people of the island will be bludgeoned with public 'information' campaigns, cut out 'n' keep guides in their newspapers, and for all I know, Manuel Barroso ringing people at random to harangue them. And if all future commissioners are cut from the same cloth as the outstandingly sound Charlie McCreevy, then the citizenry is right to fear losing the Irish commissioner.

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The return of the Holy Roman Empire?

Monday, June 23, 2008
Our lucky neighbours on the other side of the Channel / North Sea are about to see one of their high speed trains decorated with, gulp, 'the logo of European Year of Intercultural Dialogue 2008 (EYID)'. Pretty exciting, eh?

However, not really worth blogging about, except on a slow day.

However, compare and contrast this statement from Ján Figeľ (he does have that apostrophe, honest) :

"Thalys trains link the capitals and cities of four EU member states"

with this map:


Paris - check. Brussels - check. Netherlands - Amsterdam - check.

And the fourth capital city? It does sat 'the capitals', not 'capitals' of 'four EU member states'. Aachen was the seat of the Holy Roman Empire (insert the old joke here) of the German Nation, but a reborn Heiliges Römisches Reich deutscher Nation would rather cancel out Paris, Brussels and Amsterdam...

The other possibilities are that Cologne is a free city again, that the Archbishop thereof has resumed his role as a prince elector or Figel' knows something about the breakup of Belgium that the rest of us do not.

Extra special pedantic point, The Hague is not a capital of the Netherlands, although it is the seat of government.


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Trouble for the Revenue?

Good news - for once - from the EU.

This is what EU Consumer Commissioner Meglena Kuneva had to say the other day, while in these parts:

"It is particularly important for consumers to challenge the acceptability of business models based on geographical discrimination. In the world we live in, we are not obliged to shop in the supermarkets and stores of our postal code. We are not constrained to buy in our municipalities. We should also not be forced to shop within our national borders. Yet we cannot buy computers, train tickets or play-stations freely across the EU. We are forced to buy domestic. Let me be clear, there is no place in Europe's Single Market for artificial geographical restrictions which hold consumers back within national borders. I am in the process of carrying out a study on e-commerce, which I hope will start to launch the debate."

That, made law, would rather put the kibosh on our penal duty rates on tobacco and alcohol....

(NB - One does need the EU in order for cross border trade to flourish....)


Meanwhile, in another release quoting the redoubtable, and not uneasy on the eye, Ms Kuneva, she is shocked, shocked, that fewer consumers engage in cross-border e-commerce than domestic e-commerce. Erm, penal international postage, exchange rates (in some cases) and language problems?

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King Canute redux

Friday, June 20, 2008
From EUPravda:

"More EU action needed to prevent and react to natural disasters say MEPs".

Is there no limit to the EU's abilities?

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Shame on Sarko

Thursday, June 19, 2008
Yup, he has come out for the 'keep voting until you get it 'right'' approach to EU affairs. I am well aware that Sarko is far from being a eurosceptic, but it is shameful nonetheless.

Funny how countries which get it 'right' first time are never offered a chance to reconsider. As ever, the EU is a government, not of laws, but of men.

Meanwhile, here is an AP photo from the EU parliament I am borrowing, found at Belgian daily Le Soir:


I believe the chap having technical difficulties is Dutch MEP Bastian Belder

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And there was I thinking that Customs & Excise exists purely to farm taxes....

Tuesday, June 17, 2008
But how wrong I was in dismissing customs (1), douanes, zollbeamter (2) etc, judging from this comment by EU Taxation and Customs Commissar László Kovács:

"without efficient customs control at the EU's external borders, the Single Market would never have been possible".

Erm, no, László. The single market would have been possible without customs controls, just as it is possible for there to be a single market in London without goons in peaked caps stationed at the outer borough boundaries.



(1) I know it is HMRC these days, but my point is about border taxation, not general taxation, and 'customs exists' as a headline jarred. A lot.

(2). A somewhat odd German teacher at my alma mater insisted that the way to impress the ladies was to declare 'Ich bin ein zollbeamter'. The phrase stuck, although having tried the line on a few frauleinen, it has never been that effective.


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The EUS, rather than HMS, Ark Royal?

Sunday, June 15, 2008
As in European Union Ship.

"This time, Sarkozy...told the Germans about his plans to propose the creation of a European naval unit during France's presidency of the Council of the European Union, which begins on July 1. Under Sarkozy's plan, the German Navy is supposed to contribute frigates and logistics units to an aircraft carrier battle group which will sail under a European flag. The aircraft carrier itself will, according to the plan, be supplied by the United Kingdom, however, as France's prestige aircraft carrier, the Charles de Gaulle, is frequently out of service for repairs". From Der Spiegel.

Ahem: "The Royal Navy of England hath ever been its greatest defence and ornament; its ancient and natural strength; the floating bulwark of the island". Blackstone's commentaries.

And while I am at it, some Nelson:

"There is no way of dealing with the Frenchman but to knock him down - to be civil to them is to be laughed at. Why they are enemies!" 11 Jan 1798 after surrender of Capua.

"Firstly you must always implicitly obey orders, without attempting to form any opinion of your own regarding their propriety. Secondly, you must consider every man your enemy who speaks ill of your king; and thirdly you must hate a Frenchman as you hate the devil".
- to a midshipman in 1793 aboard the Agamemnon.

"To obey orders is all perfection. To serve my King and destroy the French, I consider as the great order of all, from which little ones spring; and if one of these militate against it (for who can tell exactly at a distance), I go back and obey the great order and object, to down - down with the damned French villains! My blood boils at the name of a Frenchman! Down, down with the French! … is my constant prayer".


Any readers with a record with the Senior Service have carte blanche (sorry...) to blow a gasket or two in the comments.

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What they are up to in Brussels....

Saturday, June 14, 2008
I am pleased with what our friends in the Republic of Ireland have done, and there is not much else to add on that score.

However, given the usual 'some countries are more equal than others' shenanigans that generally ensues from the government not of laws, but of men, what about this for the lead story at the EU press room:


Not the last word in visibility, but feel free to click for a more viewable version.

Those prepared to take my word for it, note the headline:

"Europe's mental health in the spotlight". Yes. Really.

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So much for 'prudence' and the 'golden rule'

Wednesday, June 11, 2008
Straight from EUPravda:

"The United Kingdom's budgetary position has deteriorated over the past year and is expected to rise above the 3% of GDP reference value in the financial year ending in March 2009. In line with the Treaty, the Commission has therefore initiated the excessive deficit procedure" said Joaquín Almunia, Economic and Monetary Affairs Commissioner.

...


The planned figure for 2008/09 provides prima facie evidence of the existence of an excessive deficit in the UK.

...

Having examined the budgetary developments as well as the short- and medium-term economic prospects and policy action taken by the UK government, the Commission concludes that the planned excess of the deficit over the reference value cannot be considered exceptional or temporary and suggests that the UK is not respecting the deficit criterion set in the Treaty.

Since 2002/03, the United Kingdom has not built a sufficient "safety margin" for fiscal policy to operate freely and supportively during normal economic downturns without significant risk of breaching the reference value. Fiscal policy was expansionary in 2007/08, in spite of robust growth, leading to a deficit estimated to have increased slightly from 2.6% of GDP in 2006/07 to 2.9% of GDP in 2007/08.

Whilst general government gross debt is projected to remain below the 60% of GDP reference value set in the EU Treaty, debt has been on a rising trend since 2001 to reach an estimated 43.8% of GDP last year.


Quite what the Commissariat is going to do apart from telling the Dour One to stand in the corner is unclear. Meanwhile I rue not knowing any Socialist and EU true believers, so I will be denied the simple pleasure of pointing and laughing.

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Nonsense on stilts. In clown boots and dayglo orange plus fours

Thursday, June 05, 2008
I have no reason to believe this is a joke:

"Australian Prime Minister Kevin Rudd, has spoken out in favour of setting up an Asian-Pacific Union. The organisation should be based on the model of the European Union. Possible member states could be Australia, China, India, Indonesia, Japan and the United States. According to Prime Minister Rudd, the Asian-Pacific Union could be set up by 2020 and would mainly benefit security, and political and economic cooperation". Source

Now Rudd is a former management consultant, they being a breed that will borrow your watch and charge you for telling the time, and can be expected to come up with idiotic suggestions on a regular basis, but even so... I am no lover of the EU, but at least membership is restricted to liberal democracies with market economies.

So, always supposing Roddo has his way, presumably there will be an Asia-Pacific 'parliament' with seats allocated on the basis of population, as it as the EU (ish). At the last count China had a population of 1.3 bn, whereas setting aside Pacific Island microstates for now, New Zealand has a population of 4.2 m, meaning it would get one MAPP (so to speak) for every 309 that China did.

Then there would be the fun of dishing out Commissariats - how comfortable would the average Australian be about a Beijing appointee being the Justice, Freedom and Security Commissar, for instance?

Further parallels welcome.

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Chemistry for mouth breathers

Monday, June 02, 2008
From the EU, naturally:


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Gorbachev to anyone listening - 'I'm not dead'

Thursday, May 29, 2008
And furthermore declares, 'look at me'.

As noted the other day, ol' splodgetop was due to attend the Energy Globe Awards, the 9th no less, and indeed did. And hung around for a good old moan the day after.

So what did the man dubbed 'a blow-dried bolshevik' (can't recall the origin, but trust me on this one) have to say, beyond my précis?

Well, firstly an epic re-writing of history:

"1990 Nobel laureate Mikhail Gorbachev, also speaking at the conference, drew on personal experience - both as a young man growing up in Stavropol (1)and a rising star in the Communist Party - to explain how his understanding and appreciation of climate change grew over the years (leading him to found, in 1993, Green Cross International(2), an advocacy group. Europe, he later argued, had a lot to learn from the experience (and errors) of the USSR, where - by the mid-80s, under Gorbachev's glasnost - the "number one issue [on people's minds] was the environment (3)".

1 - Let's be really generous and take 'young' as being under 30. That takes us to 1961 at the outside. Are we believe that he had the jump on new ice age, global warming cough the 'climate change' lobby by at least ten years?

2 - Who would have thought that road safety campaigning has gone international? Maybe Misha the Olympic bear runs the equivalent of the Tufty Club.

3 - I'm calling BS on that one. Not the cost of living, lack of civil rights, the Afghan war etc etc?


And there's more:

"Complaining about the attitude that the West took vis-à-vis the Soviet Union and the challenges it faced throughout the 1980s, he warned: “if we take the same attitude towards developing countries as we did towards the USSR”, we will face "a catastrophe."


This 1980s Soviet Union was a nuclear-armed totalitarian behemoth, and not exactly on the West's Christmas card list. If it could afford to invade Afghanistan, and fund trouble worldwide then improving the air quality in Magnitogorsk was for it to do, not us.

Meanwhile, "A special award went to Mikhail Gorbachev in recognition of his work with the "Green Cross Foundation".


Said Foundation is not exactly high profile (no wiki page), or maybe lacks the tender attentions of search engine optimisation, as the lead google hit is for an American "Academy of Traumatology, established in 1997 to bring together world leaders in the study of traumatology for the purpose of establishing and maintaining professionalism and high standards for this new field".

However, it does exist and has a fairly snazzy website. The Board has Gorbachev himself, one of his mates from the glory days back in the Kremlin, a Polish investor, a Swiss brigadier and a Portuguese Socialist. The honorary board is quite a list of the usual suspects, most of whom appear not to have done a damned thing since 2001, or perhaps have not had their biographies updated. I very much doubt that 99 year old Rita Levi-Montalcini is that active on the board. There is also something of an outbreak of the use of rather old photographs to depict both Robert Redford (when did he last make a half-way decent film?(4)) and 65 year old Pat Mitchell.

(4) Brubaker. 1980. However, we both have accountants for Standard Oil as fathers. Fascinating, eh?



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The easily pleased fan of Javier Solana

Here, in all its glory, is a youtube clip of Solana shaking hands and enquiring after the health of the President of Moldova, Vladimir Voronin. Voronin does not give an audible response, but looks contented



It is not the most exciting youtube vid I have seen, nor does it have exceptionally high production values, but at the time of posting, someone had gone to the effort of logging in to rate the video, and gave it five stars. If it was Javier, shame on him, and if not, the rater needs to check a few other videos to establish a benchmark for star ratings.

Also, youtube user Solana is friends with EUTube and EUSecurityanddefence, which is nice.

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The job so important it takes three months to replace a resignee

Wednesday, May 28, 2008
From the EU site:

"Following the resignation of Mr Markos Kyprianou from his post as a member of the European Commission, the Council of the European Union, by decision of 29 February 2008, acting in accordance with the Treaties, has decided to replace him for the remainder of his term of office. It has appointed Ms Androula Vassiliou".

Markos had his priorities right in that he would rather be the Cypriot Foreign minister. Cypriot politics would appear to be a very small pond in that Markos's pa was Cypriot president a while back, and Androula's husband has been El Presidente too. And both studied law in the UK. However, to muddy the waters somewhat, she is linked with the United Democrats, and he with the (presumably faction riven) Democrats.

Given that there cannot have been that many qualified Cypriots - and it had to be a Cypriot, EU Commissariats being what they are - why did it take three months to drag Mrs Vassiliou away from the delights of Nicosia and off to Brussels? Is it, whisper it low, possible that despite the lack of an active Health Commissar there were no outbreaks of pneumonic plague, consumption, dropsy and who knows what else?



A bit of further digging suggests that she had taken up the reins previously, and this is just a rather silly ritual, but having got that far into posting I was damned if I was going to scrap it.


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