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Even ASH might think this was over the top

A fun-loving live and let live lawyer in Sweden is suing his next door neighbour for smoking the occasional fag in her back garden. Yes, really:

"A subsequent letter...explained that the lawyer had not been able to open the windows to air his house for two years "because of the frequent odours emanating from your garden". Uh-huh.

And the plaintiff claims, "15,000 kronor (£1,100) to compensate for his suffering, along with an additional 2,000 kronor (£146) each time she lights a new cigarette".

Time for her to switch to Gran Coronas, or at the very least to Holy Roman Emperor length cigarettes, I think.

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Blogger The Hitch said... 4:57 pm

I am all in favour of this , I mean C you have taste for really ponky cheroots , fair enough in your home , but if you were to stand about outside the back of my house burning gallic tobbaco I would have to shout NO!
I wish I lived in switzerland, apart from the guns I like the idea of grassing my neighbours up for being untidy , hopefully seeing them dragged off to an underground detention centre.
I like the idea of underground detention centres.  



Blogger The Hitch said... 4:59 pm

Although I disagree with your point, if I were the smoker in question I would devote a lot of time to spreading horse shit on my garden  



Anonymous a stringbird said... 5:02 pm

Cheroots + a Winstonian V-sign.  



Blogger Croydonian said... 5:52 pm

(Now posted in the right place)


There's always the chance that you might get denounced for something too...

From the couple of days I've spent in Switzerland, it makes Bournemouth look like Vegas. Prettier though  



Blogger Andrew Allison. A Conservative View said... 6:57 pm

I have a friend in Ohio. She cannot smoke a cigarette outside her house on the porch. Unfortunately, I can forsee calls for similar legislation here after the smoking ban has taken place.  



Blogger Newmania said... 12:59 am

There are already calls for such legislation . In the West End due to the banns on smoking in bars large numbers of smokers have congregated outside and the legality of this innocent amusement is under threat ,. I belive it may be a Livingstone thing .

As I always say , here is no end to arguement from safety and what I would like to hear is some debate about where the line can be drawn. There is the odiously famiiar ratchet effect in that all such legislation if fiedishly difficult to unravel


I tend to think that people so unwilling to rub along with their fellow man should be forced to live on a small boat with a large smelly person and therby learn the inestimable benefits of easy tolerance.

I disagree with Hitch on underground detention centres . I favour wierdly psychodelic dislocating enviroments that may or may not be a hallucination.
On torture ,the Counter Reformation was perhaps the gold standard .I have read that the Inquisition usually had to do no more than show the victim their instruments.

Seriously though the trick is to keep the dehumanised terror victim in a state of compus mentis whilst enduring maddening pain. During the French revoltution it was discovered that removing someones nose and applying white hot metal to the exposed nerve can good results .

I `m afraid in these brutish days these skills have fallen by the wayside.......what a sad loss it is ...  



Anonymous verity said... 2:57 am

Oh, Newmania, I am laughing as I type this. That was a funny post.

I have to differ with you on the gold standard, though. This would be keeping the internees awake while bright lights forced them to watch Tony Blair's conferences performances and interviews. "No! Honestly! I say to you. I stowed away on a plane! Honestly! I was such a lad!!! From Newcastle. To the Bahamas!

It doesn't matter that there were never any such flights, because my reality says it was so because I am the prime minister of the once-powerful country of Great Britain, before I signed it away, and now I am speaking in Mockney to a couple of chavs called Richard and Judy. You can see how versatile I am.  



Anonymous verity said... 3:15 am

I do hear Paula Abdul, played at volume for hours on end, is effective to loosen the lips of muslim terrorist internees.

I read a rather charming anecdote about Gitmo. An American service dog who walked around the boundaries each day, all day, in the heat, and stayed alert and intelligent and interested in his job, got to go and sleep, after his/her dinner in an air-condtioned kennel after his/her eight hours of duty.

And a whiny little muslim prisoner who was getting three square meals a day, free, complained. Of course, they don't like dogs, and he asked why a dog got to sleep in an air conditioned kennel at the end of its tour of duty when the muslim prisoneers just got fresh air.

And the serviceman replied, "Because this dog is a member of the the United States military. Any further questions?"  



Blogger The Hitch said... 4:37 pm

Mr Mania I have no issues with your ideas , i just happen to think that we should do it underground.

Croydonian I would love the oppurtunity to denounce people.
It is illegal in Switzerland not to hose down the outside of your house once a week , I am all in favour of that.
I would also like to see citizen firing squads for serious wrongdoers  



Blogger Newmania said... 12:18 am

What a shame the requirements of filthy sordid trade kept me away from this at the time but should anyone pop in I laughed like a shrieking monkey.


rats , I hate work but there we go. I also enjoyed Verity in her recent Dale escapade on hand shaking . Vintage V ...which i was also to late for.Oh for a private income , were ever two such well suited lovers as me and it kept asunder...

I think not  



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